**I’ve recently joined the TALK NERDY TO ME, LOVER family and I am super excited to be writing for Jen Friel’s site on a weekly basis**
MY FIRST POST
I’ve never really considered myself a nerd.
I mean yeah, sure, I wore big ole thick glasses since 2nd grade, was a bit of a teacher’s pet all thru elementary school, did every extra credit homework assigned to me, got mostly straight A’s and took honors classes all thru school, BUT,
I LOVE, as in LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, those long haired bad boys of rock n roll,
(notice POISON tape in hand of above nerd)
So when Jen asked me to introduce myself to all of y’all by way of talking about what makes me nerdy, I had to stop and go hmmm… what makes me nerdy?
I was pondering this question on my way to an interview for a temp. job. A temp job working in a tax preparer’s office. An interview I was very excited about, because I love numbers, I love charts, graphs, formulas, tax forms, spreadsheets, charts, lists (of all kinds), statistics, analyltics, and just plain ole numbers.
I count everything. Like the stairs for instance, as I walk up and down them. I keep lists of everything, like the number of men I’ve slept with (and the number of times with each one).
I’m also one of those ppl that literally counts the number of Happy Birthday FB posts I get each year.
Hmm.. maybe I have a problem. I wonder if there’s a disorder associated with too much counting. I’m sure there must be.
I wasnt the best Math student, as in it wasn’t super easy for me (like say english or social studies) but again, I did get mostly A’s, except for 9th Grade Geometry where I failed miserably, (the only class I ever failed), but i still blame the cute rocker boy who sat next to me. I think I failed on purpose, so that I could go to summer school and spend more time with him.
There’s that rocker boy theme again.. see that’s sort of the dichotomy of my life adventures. I’m a super smart, well-spoken, fast thinking, analytical type girl, who at the drop of a dime will drive to say, Sturgis, South Dakota to interview Alice in Chains and Guns N Roses.
It’s that sort of dichotomy that attracted me to TNTML in the first place.
I first discovered Jen Friel thru Robot Chicken. Now, you may be scratching your head and saying what in the world do Jen and Robot Chicken have in common, but see it’s really quite simple. I’m what is known by many in the biz, as a “hyphenate”, as in actor-host-producer-writer hyphenate, one of the sub-factions of my hyphenate is that I am a voice over actor, and have recorded quite a few (over 30) character voices for Robot Chicken.
How does that relate to Jen? Well the creators of Robot Chicken put together a social experiment of sorts about a year or so ago, (Control TV) where they allowed the viewers to choose which dates their nerdy guy of choice went on.. : enter Jen :
I began following her on twitter, and soon discovered TNTML. I fell in love with her that same night. Here was this obviously intelligent, adorable young lady, just bearing her heart and soul and the little pieces that make up her life. And I felt a kinship, a kinship when she wrote about family heartbreaks and secrets, that take eternity to heal, a kinship when she wrote about random adventures with random people that most of the world would look at as dangerous at best, and a serious kinship with her quest to find the right guy thru a series of sexual adventures and tales from the bedroom.
I myself, am in my 30’s , never been married, no children, and have had my fair share of escapades… I’ve got some wild tales to tell that’s for sure, but am I ready to bear it all for the TNTML community, I guess will see.
I’ve been wanting to write for TNTML since the first day I discovered it, but I had been procrastinating, not knowing what to write about, which part of my crazy little world to focus on, which face to show you guys.. the nerdy little second grader who prided herself on being the teacher’s pet, the teenager who thought sex with random guys was equivalent to love and affection, the 20-something year old who moved 3000 miles from home, became friends with porn stars and toured with rock bands, or the 30-something year old who publishes poetry books, spends new years doing kundalini yoga, and creates vision boards hoping to eventually find her soulmate and lover.
And last week at Trivia Night (which btw I LOVE TRIVIA and BOARD GAMES of all kinds!), Jen looked at me and said, just write, you don’t have to worry about any categories or areas to focus on, just write, and I’ll put the labels on it.. just write.
And you know what, that’s sort of the procrastination of my life.. just write. A psychic on sunset strip, actually a few pychics over the years have told me I need to write, but that’s another post for another time..
So here am I writing my very first fo Talk Nerdy to Me Lover post from Las Vegas, Nevada where I am currently working at the CES convention as a promo model for Blackberry.
I suppose the fact that I even know what CES is, already puts me in the nerd category, the fact that I LOVE it here, solidifies that. TECHNOLOGY EVERYWHERE.. and CUTE tech-savy boys everywhere.
My first time at CES, was about 10 years ago, with my girlfriend Kendra who was presenting at the AVN Awards (aka pornstar awards). I don’t remember much about that weekend tho, ‘cept there were a lot of drugs, (A LOT), a lot of alcohol, a lot of naked people, after hour strip clubs and parties, and not much sleep.
This year, is way more tame than that trip to CES, well so far anyways, I’ve still got 3 nights left in Vegas.
Thanks for accepting me into the TNTML world, I hope you enjoy my posts, and please comment.. I have abandonment issues, I need affirmations of your love on a regular basis.
I’ve done just a few vision boards over the years, and it’s been quite a few years. I’d say about 9 months ago I bought some poster boards and was hoping to make some vision boards with some girlfriends back in Philly, but it never happened. So after much procrastination I finally made one, for the first full moon of 2012.
and took Jamie’s suggestion to use the theme of this full moon, “the wolf moon”, to guide your vision board into “what do you hunger for?”.. I then broke it down into 3 areas I really hunger for, and that’s 1)Financial Flow 2) LOVE and ROMANCE and 3) JOY (anything that brings me joy)
I love the way it came out.. in the bottom right hand corner there is a cluster of photos that have to do with being a working, successful actress (JOY), including a great group shot of lovely women, looking happy and proud holding their awards (of some kind).. lately I’ve been surrounded by a bunch of new (in my life), career-driven, kick-ass women, and I want that to continue.
The bottom left is all about love… passionate photo, phrases like “Im Yours” and “His & Hers”.. things that I truly hunger to feel, live, and say.
Upper left is all about the money flow.. a pile of money with the word freedom above it, really caught my eye.
Upper right.. signifies more joy.. family.. vacations.. simplifying. I hunger for a time, where I dont have to run, run, run, run from freelance gig to freelance gig, just to keep treading water.
And in the center from top to bottom… the top starts off with body/mind/spirit photos and phrases.. yoga..retreats… body.. spontaneous happiness… all the way down to the bottom with date, marriage, house..
Feels good to take a moment to really look and feel these images and words resonate within me..
Going to make this a regular habit.. hope you do too! :)
1. What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?
WON a contest for LASIK eye surgery, found out my eyes were too poor, and instead they performed a surgery, giving me IMPLANTABLE CONTACT LENSESICL Surgery! Performed in the Vagina Monologues, Co-Produced a tv pilot, took my Mom to her first yoga class, weekly accupuncture sessions, worked promo gigs all up and down the east coast, taught classes to actors in Philadelphia, was a guest speaker at Philly’s SAG Conservatory, auditioned in Philly and New York, spoke at my former high school and college on the entertainment biz, attended my sister Sara’s wedding, became an Aunt for my first nephew EJ, began hosting for Mingle Media Tv, spoke on a group panel with some of *the* most kick-ass ladies I know, at the Comikaze Expo, and bought my first Hybrid car.
2. Did you keep your 2011 resolutions? Will you make more for 2012?
I’m more about mottos, mantras, affirmations and goals then “resolutions”. 2011 was a healing and recharging year for me. I spent 9 months of it on the east coast, spending time with family and friends and exploring career opportunities in the Philly community. My goal was to slow down, make money, and heal some of my deep hurts. I made progress on each of those goals.
2012 is about recognizing and asking for my worth. No more free “work”. Focus on abundance, prosperity, and happiness. And who knows, just maybe I’ll find a romantic partner this year (but I feel like a broken record on that one!).
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes, my sister in law Jill, gave birth to her first child, my beautiful nephew EJ! :)
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes, unfortunately. A very close, soul-mate friend from Philly died in a car accident in LA. www.johnnygtribute.com On the up-side Johnny’s passing connected me to some amazing new (and old) people on both coasts whom I may have never met otherwise who have become some of the best friends I have, in only a few months.
5. What countries did you visit?
None.. just a ton of places in the US
6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Financial Prosperity. Steady Income. A solid team (agent/manager). Romance and Love.
7. What date from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory and why?
May 2nd- My nephew was born. Aug 14th - My sister got married Aug 28th- Johnny passed away
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Hmmm.. I guess tackling a “new” city, was my biggest achievement. Although I grew up in the Philadelphia area, I’ve lived in LA for 11 years and had no connection with the film community there. In 2011 I secured a kick-ass agent in Philly, and got involved in so many projects and met some really wonderful people, I even auditioned for a really juicy role in a feature film, where I woulda played opposite Tom Cruise in a few scenes! :)
9. What was your biggest failure? Would have to say my weight. In 2010 I put on 50 pounds and in 2011 I bounced around 10-20 pounds here and there but at the end of 2011, I’m still 50 pounds heavier then I like to be, and where I feel healthiest at.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I sprained my ankle severly in October. My 2nd day back in Los Angeles. It’s still not 100% yet. :(
11. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Well, my sister got married so that was definite cause for celebration! :)
Also, everyone who pitched in to help me make the LA Tribute to Johnny in October, a very special event, especially- Nick Rozz, Jon Seminara, Amber Rain, Lisa Carbonara, David George, Troy Patrick Farrell, and Tina Norris.
12. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
I believe that we have control over our emotions, so the times that I was depressed—- well, I have only myself to look at. I’m wokring on healing the parts of me that are hurt.
13. Where did most of your money go?
Paying off debt and family loans. And GAS!
14. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Ummm.. WINNING AN EYE SURGERY CONTEST! :) Being on the team of GAME OVER, a bunch of auditions, and new friends.
16. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
a little sadder
b) thinner or fatter?
A little bit fatter.. I’m working on that.
c) richer or poorer?
17. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Eat healthier, write, date, KISS
18. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Getting caught up in family arguments or disagreements rather then “flipping the switch” and enjoying every moment of the precious time I spent with them this year.
19. How will you be spending Christmas?
For the first time in my life, I spent Christmas away from my family, alone in LA. I went to a beautiful kundalini yoga class in the morning, and had dinner with my friend Michele over her friends’ house in the evening.
20. Did you fall in love in 2011?
21. What was your favorite TV program?
TRUE BLOOD, GAME OF THRONES, and V
22. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I don’t use the word hate.. hate is such an awful word and emotion. Looking back I had relatively little drama in my life this year, can’t think of a single person I fought with.. a few let-downs, and dissapointments, but no one that I hate.
Oh wait there was that one jerk-off of a subletter I had this summer while I was gone.. :)
23. What was the best book you read?
I know I read a lot of books this year, I’m just having difficulty remembering them. “The Call” by Oriah Mountain Dreamer was a good one.
24. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I don’t think I’ve discovered any new music in 2011. Bummer
25. What did you want and get?
Free Eye Surgery! A Philly Agent!
26. What did you want and not get?
My Soulmate. Financial Freedom. A solid LA team of representation.
27. What was your favorite film of this year?
The Help was good, but my favorite was Another Happy Day
28. What did you do on your birthday? How old were you?
I turned 37. I had dinner in Media, PA with my Mom and 2 sisters while they laughed at me getting tipsy on Sake.
29. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Steadier work = Steadier Income
30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
A few more dresses, jeans, boots.. the usual.
31. What kept you sane?
Yoga, Accupuncture, My spiritual healer Suchitra, Flower Essences, Sleeping 32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
For some reason I had multiple dreams this year starring John Stamos.
33. What political issue stirred you the most?
I’ve been actively following the Occupy movement and getting more involved. I’ve become an Associate Producer on this project: http://www.OccupyTheMovie.com
34. Who did you miss?
I usually say my family here, but since I was with them, I’ll say Los Angeles as if she was a person and not a city.
35. Who was the best new person you met?
I met SO many awesome new people on the East Coast, wow, this is hard, the entire GAME OVER TEAM (esp Dave Bullis, ChrisP, JoeyD, Kenneth McG. and Will Ball), my Philly SAG peeps (esp Mike Kraycik & Frank Traynor), my partner in promo-adventures Lysa Kim, my accupuncturist Stephanie Massimini, my spiritual healer Suchitra Davenport, and last but not least the entire G Team: Tanya, Mari, Lauren, Leila, Paul, Ronnie, Mark, Tom, Patty, Michelle V, Michelle, Annette, Rich, Alyssa, Lisa Carbonara, Nick, Cleveland, Lisa A, RPT, but most especially if I had to pick just one person it would be reconnecting with TINA NORRIS after 10 years.
36. What valuable life lesson did you learn in 2011?
I learned that no matter where you are geographically, the things that make your heart soar and come alive, will find you, if you let them. That nothing is too permanent to change it.. that I can detach from people, places, and things, and just start over, and over, and over again if neccessary. That no one but myself is judging my successes and failures.. and at the end of the day, being around ppl and places I love is what truly matters.
37. What song lyrics sum up your year?
I’m not surprised, not everything lasts I’ve broken my heart so many times, I stopped keeping track Talk myself in, I talk myself out I get all worked up, then I let myself down
I tried so very hard not to lose it I came up with a million excuses I thought, I thought of every possibility
And I know someday that it’ll all turn out You’ll make me work, so we can work to work it out And I promise you, kid, that I give so much more than I get I just haven’t met you yet
I might have to wait, I’ll never give up I guess it’s half timing, and the other half’s luck Wherever you are, whenever it’s right You’ll come out of nowhere and into my life
And I know that we can be so amazing And, baby, your love is gonna change me And now I can see every possibility