There are so many challenges I’m facing right now.. and I want to share them with all of you, exactly what’s going on, but I’m choosing to focus on the positive, and continue to manifest the desired outcomes that I am seeking and visualising.
When this is all over, I’ll be able to discuss and share, exactly what I conqured, but I don’t want to give any more strength to the “problems” at hand by talking about them.
This past month, hell the past 6 months back in Los Angeles after my year hiatus, have been some of the toughest and most challenging times of my life.
I am working hard at staying calm, focused, and open, present and available to the opportunities that I know are just around the corner.
That being said, my head is currently EXPLODING after a conversation with my little brother, I love him, he is such a kind and empathetic human being, but his solution is “call mom”, “come home”…. I tried that already.
Fall of 2010 to Fall of 2011, I relocated back to Aston, PA.
And although, I had definite successes, and met a lot of great new ppl, reading back over the blogs while I was there, I was lonely, sad, bored, and felt like more of an outcast then ever. (i.e. single-30-something-no children-freelance-artist is NOT that common in the suburbs of philladelphia)
Yes, yes, as Bon Jovi sang … “who says you can’t go home.”… and as Dorothy Gale says, “there’s no place like home…”
But sometimes… going home, is not the answer, sometimes you have to plow through it.
THERE ARE SO MANY AWESOME OPPORTUNITIES PRESENTING THEMSELVES!!
Like the phonecall I just got off of about a very possible full-time position doing something quite awesome with a new angle on an old thing in the media/entertainment world.
And the phone-conference last week about a spotlight on ME on a brand new social media platform backed by some pretty amazing ppl, including an actor who’s life work I admire.
And the event tomorrow, a press conference, where I’ll be interviewing a legendary rock band, that I’ve been a fan of since childhood.
Most of these things are still in the beginning stages, and cant really be discussed, and aren’t quite tangible anyways,…..
but yes, behind me the walls are crumbling down and there’s nothing really I can do about it.
It has to happen. The walls crumble down, to rebuild something stronger and better, and it may seem scary, in fact it’s fucking terrifying…. and for my brother 3000 miles away, it must seem really scary that he’s unable to do anything to help his sister….other than pray she doesn’t get crushed when the cinder blocks fall, and that a helping hand arrives in time…
but his sister, me.. Im an adult. I chose this career, this path, this journey, and even tho my walls are crumbling, my heart is holding fast.
As long as I can keep my brain from exploding…everything is going to be just fine.